New Inspiration

Well here I am. Finally back!!!! I know that it has been almost 2 years since my last post but much has happened since May 2010. We moved in June 2010 into a bigger house and then in October 2010 we finished our licensing for Foster Care. In Feb 2011 our home welcomed two beautiful baby boys!!! A healthy newborn of 3 weeks and a sweet little man of 1 1/2 yrs. old. Drake and Dylan. (As we call them.) What a whirlwind my life has been since.

Let me share our story. We adopted our daughter Dakota from birth through a friend. She is an amazing little girl. When she was 4 years old, one night after a night time prayer, she gets this really serious look on her face and says, "Mommy, I need to tell you something important...". Then she tells me that "Her Jesus said to tell mommy and daddy to hurry up." "Hurry up with what?", I said. Then she tells me, "Hurry up because my brothers are waiting." I almost cried and the spirit filled the whole room and I knew perfectly what she meant. My husband and I had talked for almost 2 years about doing Foster Care so that Dakota would not grow up alone. For most of our married life and Dakota's we had been living in some sort of construction zone. (Because one of the ways we made income was to flip houses). We'd finish turning a dump into a palace and then sell it and move into another dump and start over. After 7 houses in 13 years, it was time for us to finally move into a home that was finished where we could raise a family and really call it "Home". Dakota knew this as well and she sort of led the way.

We started searching for a home and moved in June. We completed training and licensing in October and then we waited. And waited. And waited. From October to February, we received 7 calls from CPS to take children. Each time they called we emphatically and excitedly said, "YES" and then we would get a call a day or two later telling us that they were placed somewhere else. Either with a relative or with another foster family that was quicker to say yes or closer to where the child (children) was residing. So when we got a call about 8 pm on a Monday night in the middle of an icy blizzard, we totally thought that again, it wouldn't actually happen. On top of that we all three (my husband, Dakota and I) all had a terrible flu. It was one of the worst stomach viruses we had ever had and all three of us down at the same time was absolute misery.

An hour later at 9:00 our case worker showed up with two babies and they too were both very sick. One had a sinus infection and the other an upper respiratory infection and both were very hungry and dehydrated with horrible (and I mean HORRIBLE) diaper rash. Bloody. They were clearly upset and confused and no one really felt well enough to deal with all the changes at once. I remember after getting everyone settled and to bed by midnight and I started to pick up the house. I thought to myself. Lord you must really think I can do this. Two of them at once? Oaaaayyy.

The very last thing I picked up was a book from Dakota's bed time story. Usually I read her the bedtime story, but I was feeling so horrible that night, that daddy read her the story while I rested. She was in bed before we even got the call, so she didn't know about her new brothers until the morning, but ironically and intuitively, the book she had picked out was titled, "How to prepare when the baby comes". Chills ran through my heart and I knew without a doubt that these two little guys were here to stay forever. Looking back, another confirmation came when we realized that Dakota had told us to "Hurry up...my brothers are waiting" the last week of April of 2010 and here we were 10 months later with a 3 week old in our home and the words of the prophets rang loud in my mind, "And a little child shall lead them." What an amazing miracle. She has a gift.

I almost thought we wouldn't make it through that first week. We couldn't leave the house because the roads were so bad and everyone was deathly ill. No one came in and no one came out. I don't know how we made it. I remember one night after about 3 days, I just laid there in bed late at night crying myself to sleep. I was in shock!!! Most people don't get a newborn AND a toddler at the time same and the things this little toddler had been through would make the hairs on your head stand up. I had a BIG job to do.

This past year has flown by. I just turned 39 and I realized that if I wanted to be 40 and fabulous that I needed to get my act together....and quick!!!! The kids are getting bigger and busier. They have school and sports and I have to keep up with them. That's awfully hard to do in a 300 lb body. So I need to get it together.

I've watched my parents over the years battle with morbid obesity (I hate that word.) My mother topped out 15 years ago at 475 lbs (at 5'2" tall.) After breaking her hip at Disneyland and spending time in a nursing home at 45 yrs old, her doctor recommended gastric bypass. She went down to 180 lbs but her problems were far from over. Since that first surgery, she has had almost 50 surgeries related to her weight. First is was her hip, then multiple foot operations, then her gall bladder and spleen. Next her knees and then her shoulders and then her heels. And I can't even begin to tell you how many surgeries on her back and spine. She even has a spinal chord stimulator installed with a batter charger. Her small frame just couldn't handle all that weight all those years and had deteriorated over time. I am no doctor, but it seemed to me that her bones became more and more brittle after the gastric bypass due to malnutrition. She did not drink her protein supplements or take her vitamins as instructed by her doctor and she did no form of exercise.
And even though she lost the weight, she still had food issues. Instead of eating a whole can of Pringles Potato Chips in one setting, she would snack on the entire can throughout the day. It made me sad and worried to see her in such bad shape.

My dad is a 400 lb diabetic who has had 3 episodes in the past years of diabetic shock. He had gastric bypass almost 10 years ago and since has gained back most of his weight.

It's been sad to see both of them lose their health at such a young age. They are both 56. I've spend countless hours in doctor offices and in emergency rooms and surgery waiting rooms watching my parents suffer, wondering which one of them will die first and how. I know it's a morbid to think about, but the reality of it is this.....being overweight all those years, both of them, has literally taken 20 years of their "Golden Years" away. The fun and good feeling "high" that foodies get when they over indulge has just as much of a high price to pay as addicts and alchoholics pay for abusing drugs and alchohol.

I just felt like it was time. My friend Genie has been a good example to me this past year. She is a another big girl like me with a Skinny Diva on the inside. She has lot 60 pounds this year and I am so proud of her. She posted on her blog that she really wanted a book. So I bought it, read it and passed it on to her. After reading this book, something just clicked for me. It's by a man named Sean Anderson called "Transformation Road". I decided to make some changes. I started on March 1st at 298.6 lbs and to day I am sitting at 282.2. 16.4 pounds gone and I have to say to quote Sean, "I'm choosing change before change chooses me".

I could relate a lot of things in my life to this man's story, but I also have a story of my own and after much self examination, I think I'm going to share a little more than I had intended when I started this blog almost 2 years ago. So here's to new inspiration. I hope this journey will help others in some small way learn to cope not just with getting the weight off, but with getting our minds right about food and health. Chao Divas!!!