When Did I Have "That Moment"? The one where the lights finally came on .

So, many of you are wondering about my "light bulb" moment...that one instant where I first realized that I needed to make a change. Well, it wasn't the time I left the movie theater feeling "sick" because the seats were too small and uncomfortable to sit in for two hours. And unfortunately it wasn't the 3rd (yes 3rd) time I had broken the toilet seat trying to reach an unreachable place to clean myself and then later when asked by my husband... I blamed it on standing on the toilet to hang something on the wall behind it. And amazingly, NO it wasn't the time my 3 year old asked me if I had a baby in my tummy and got excited because she so desperately wants a sibling. No, my moment came to me in a simple but small way.....about a week ago, late one night while flipping channels on the cable TV.

I'm not a big follower of reality TV, but in my quest to find something decent on the cable, I came across "Ruby"- a woman who once weighed in at 750 pounds and had lost over half of her body weight so far. Ruby is a beautiful Red Head with lots of heart and a big personality from Georgia. I could relate to Ruby AND her struggles. I've watched parts of her show here and there over the past few months so, when I ran across her show that evening , I decided to sit and watch for a few minutes.

Ruby was in a group setting among friends with a therapist who advocates a 12 step approach towards food. During the therapy, words like "comfort zone", "enablers" and "denial" were thrown out there and as Ruby fidgeted and squirmed in her seat she and I BOTH realized we were in DENIAL and that the only way to overcome was to invite the Lord into our problem. Now how about that???!!@#$%&*

I couldn't believe it. I had never realized that I (Yes ME!!!) could be denial. Like I said before, the truth is out there. I was always blaming everyone and everything else around me, but what I NEEDED to do was STOP........ and just simply ASK my Father in Heaven for HIS help. I NEVER, NEVER, EVER thought of that before. Of actually asking God to help ME?? I had always figured that I got myself into this mess and that somehow, I would get myself out, some day, later, whenever I had the time. But that's not the truth of it.... that's not how it works. Every day, little by little until one day I can become whole again, I'm going to ask for help from above. Help to resist the temptation of food, help to get up when I'm tired and still exercise and do what I know I should be doing. Help to not be too hard on myself when I fall short. And maybe one day.....I can become ME again. It would be nice to recognize my own face in the mirror once more.

So here we are starting a new plan. It's gonna take fatih, some attitude, understanding, drive and most of all love and friendship. Today's Big Fat Truth, we all need a little of God's help to get through. Are you ready????

Monday is a new week, I'll begin posting stats and more info. Please feel free to comment, uplift, inspire and offer advice. My ears are open. :-)